Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
