You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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