Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
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I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
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Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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