He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize