Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
