we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
