Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize