JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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