Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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