It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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