He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
