who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize