Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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