Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
