It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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