You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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