Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
