Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize