Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
