He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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