i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
