Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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