well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
try to milk me bitch
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