You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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