What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
