party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
