I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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