im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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