Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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