Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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