Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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