did you get engaged???
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
