I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
