I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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