My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize