what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize