would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize