How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize