i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize