So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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