it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
