dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
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