I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
