Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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