dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
