Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
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Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
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Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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