Small penises have feelings too.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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