im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
