Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
