The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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