Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
